What is a father ?

I wrote this the night before my father’s funeral in the year 2000 and read it at his graveside service. It really brings back wonderful memories of my father.

What is a Father ?

            A father is the person who loves you the most, that is of course not counting your mother. A father is the person who you love the most, once again of course not counting your mother.

A father is the happiest when he finally gets his first son, although his daughter is closest to his heart. He even makes the doctor hold you upside down to make sure that you are really a boy…he is so excited! He’s that guy that buys you your first football and baseball mitt, even though you are only 4 days old.

He’s the guy that builds you up and finally tells you are old enough to finally cut the grass, knowing he’ll never have to cut it again himself. He is the guy that times how fast you run down the driveway and back to get the mail and tells you how many seconds it took and that you broke your old record…although he didn’t even have his watch on.

He’s the guy that picks you up at your first baseball practice and tells you how terrific you looked on the field although you had your glove on the wrong hand. He’s the guy that convinces your mother that you and he would be better off going to a baseball game together than going to your sister’s ballet recital. He’s the guy that goes to work at sun up and comes home late in the day exhausted…only to find you waiting for him by the mailbox with two baseball mitts and a ball in hand…and he tells you he hurried home just so he could play catch with you.

Your father is the one that spent millions on your private school education only hoping that they wouldn’t expel you for something you’ve done stupid before you could graduate. He’s the guy that gives you your first car…and hopes you don’t kill yourself in it. He’s the one that pretends not to see you when your friends let you out at the bottom of the driveway after having 20 beers…and you are only 18.

He’s the one who spends another million on your college education and hopes you don’t sell your books for beer money before exams. He’s the one who prays for you every night…that you graduate in 4 years.

He’s the guy who gives you a job in the summer and on the way home together doesn’t ask, “How was your day”. He knows that 20-minute power nap you are getting is more important because you have a date that night. He’s the guy who is happiest when you finally move out of the house, and he hugs your mother as you drive out of the driveway…and she is crying.

He’s the best man in your wedding…and maybe the proudest that day. He gives you all the great “fatherly advice”…why, because his father had given it to him and now it’s your turn. He’s the guy that loans you enough money to get your first home…then he tells you later that you don’t have to pay him back.

A father is the person who is always there for you, either rain or shine. But he realizes you have your own life now, but wants to be as much a part of it as you will let him.

Your father has always been the biggest, bravest and toughest person you have known…until he starts to get old…and frail. Then YOU realize that you are now the tough one and he is not. A father is the person who watches out for you as long as he can…no matter what, for 60 or 70 years. And then it finally comes to you…it’s time for you to watch out for him…for the rest of his life…no matter what.

My kids…10 years ago

At Ma Ruby’s Restaurant (Home of the “Cheeseburger in Paradise”)…Harbour Island, Bahamas !!

A Special Day is coming

A lot of interesting things have happened over the years on December 20th:

1780 – Britain declares war on Holland.
1812 – “Grimm’s Fairy Tales” by Jacob and Wilhelm Grimm is published.
1820 – Missouri imposes a $1 bachelor tax on unmarried men between 21 & 50.
1879 – Tom Edison privately demonstrated incandescent light at Menlo Park.
1892 – Phileas Fogg completes around world trip.
1920 – Bob Hope becomes an American citizen.
1957 – Elvis Presley given draft notice to join US Army for National Service.

But the greatest event will happen on “this” December 20, 2014…my beautiful daughter Mallory is getting married. This will by far be the greatest and most special day in my life !!!

My grandson’s memoir

My grandson who is in the 5th grade was given a writing assignment…to write a memoir.  Here is what he wrote:

The Red Pickup Truck

The day my dad came home from my grandparent’s house was one of the happiest days of my life. He was driving my granddad’s 26 year old red pickup truck. That was four years ago, and since then, Dad and I drive it to every football and baseball practice and game I’ve played in since then. It’s my favorite car, and I ride in it every chance I get. My dad says that the air conditioning stopped working fifteen years ago, so we have to roll the windows down with the manual handle thingies. I know what you’re thinking. How can you still drive the truck after thirty years? Since my dad and his dad, Tuck, only drove it to and from football and baseball, it only has 39,000 miles!

I was sitting in the truck after football one day, and I sat on the seat back in the truck. It flopped over, and I found all kinds of “treasure” back there. I found a rusty, weathered baseball bat with no grip, a bunch of new baseballs, a popped football, a daddy longlegs, and lots and lots of dirt. I asked, “Dad, what is all this stuff doing back here?” “I was waiting for you to find that,” He replied.

But my favorite part of riding in the truck is my dad. We tell each other things that only I know or he knows, and that conversation never leaves the truck, unless the person who said the secret wants it to. We have fun talking about sports and other stuff. In football season, we talk football. In baseball season we talk baseball. We almost always know the stats, but sometimes we have to look them up. I love riding in the truck during the rain, but my dad doesn’t. I love it because the windshield wipers don’t work very well, so it looks like someone put a shower door where our windshield should be. Which is the exact reason my dad doesn’t like driving the truck in the rain. My dad and I love looking at other people’s reactions to seeing a thirty year old truck driving around Chastain Park full of tackling dummies or baseball equipment.

Many times people have asked us if the truck was for sale, and many times have we said no. If we ever go out to eat with teammates after practice, they have a war about who gets to ride in the truck with us. Everyone says I’m so lucky to have the truck to ride in to and from every practice. Every now and then, Maggie (my sister) rides in the truck with us, and she makes us listen to this song she says she loves. (I don’t actually think she likes it, I think she’s just trying to annoy me.) She rides in truck to softball, and she loves it almost as much as me. I love it more, though. She has a hard time rolling down the windows with the crank thing. I know how she feels, because I also wasn’t able to roll down those windows when I was her age.

I think that riding in the truck has taught me a lesson: any time spent with family members is time well spent.